Thoughts — Pop Psychology

Here’s a fun fact for January. We are social beings and the reason our species has survived is because of our ability to band in groups and form connections. Forming these connections means occupying space in someone else's life and letting someone else occupy space in yours. It comes with us experiencing a wide range of emotions in relationships - from unbridled happiness all the way to gut-wrenching disappointment - while also allowing others to be concerned about you and caring for you and vice versa. Quite the spectrum, isn’t it? There is a common belief that when one shows...

It’s a tale as old as time. Shaming and humiliation has been around for decades. We all use it at home as well as in society. But what are they exactly?  Shame and humiliation are negative feelings associated with dishonour, self hate, disgrace and regret. There are 4 types of shame according to psychotherapist Burgo, which are unrequited love and rejection, unwanted exposure, disappointed expectation and exclusion.  Back in the day, public shaming was necessary in order to have a kingdom of loyal subjects, a better understanding of who was not conforming to the norms and needed to be pulled...

I am in the midst of a month-long Netflix binge.  My current indulgence is the second season of Never Have I Ever (disclaimer: this post is unlikely to be a spoiler because the season came out many moons ago.) Devi dates both Ben and Paxton, thus cheating on both boys. As predicted, when they eventually find out about the “betrayal”, both boys are upset, as most people would be, and make her “pay” for it.  This got me thinking, as do most conversations about infidelity, what makes infidelity hurt so much? Does revenge really make up for pain? Conversations with...

Have you ever stared at the ceiling for what might seem like hours on end or not know what to do with yourself on a particularly dry Sunday? It seems like you're clearly bored. We’ve all experienced it.  So what is boredom, really? Boredom describes wanting to do something stimulating, satisfying, fulfilling or purposeful but not being able to do so. Boredom is a considerable bother. It can lead to behaviours that might lead to favourable (e.g. creativity) and unfavourable consequences (e.g. substance abuse).  In a preliminary study, researchers asked people to sit down in a laboratory and try to...

We’ve all been on social media long enough to know that restaurants with a bunch of influencers promoting it only have their 5 star ratings because of their pastel colours and fancy cutlery. Food? I could make that pasta at home. Likewise, products flaunted by fancy fashion influencers apparently only work wonders on their skin, not ours. And let me not even begin with the new clothing brands on Instagram, they always leave me overwhelmed. Yes, I want it but will it really look as good on me as it looks on that ‘one’ influencer who also seems appealing in...