Thoughts — Opinion

Here’s a fun fact for January. We are social beings and the reason our species has survived is because of our ability to band in groups and form connections. Forming these connections means occupying space in someone else's life and letting someone else occupy space in yours. It comes with us experiencing a wide range of emotions in relationships - from unbridled happiness all the way to gut-wrenching disappointment - while also allowing others to be concerned about you and caring for you and vice versa. Quite the spectrum, isn’t it? There is a common belief that when one shows...

I did a stupid thing recently - I decided I needed a break from meaningful relationships in my life. Yup, it felt as dumb as it sounds. But I still think I did it for all the right reasons. You see, society said I need to have meaningful relationships as I grow up, so I went ahead and made quite a few of them over time. But for a very long while now, I have felt weirdly hollow; like I was missing something, I almost felt uncomfortable in my own skin. And after quite a few days of thinking, I...

It’s a tale as old as time. Shaming and humiliation has been around for decades. We all use it at home as well as in society. But what are they exactly?  Shame and humiliation are negative feelings associated with dishonour, self hate, disgrace and regret. There are 4 types of shame according to psychotherapist Burgo, which are unrequited love and rejection, unwanted exposure, disappointed expectation and exclusion.  Back in the day, public shaming was necessary in order to have a kingdom of loyal subjects, a better understanding of who was not conforming to the norms and needed to be pulled...

Today I find the word communication being thrown around a lot. Especially when it comes to close relationships. Do I believe it's important .. yes? Is it always effective … maybe? Let me try and help you understand where I am coming from.  Communication, especially when it comes to expression, is extremely important; I 100% believe that no one can read your mind. Sometimes when we try to communicate our needs, it helps us express and understand ourselves better and even have clarity of what is happening. Hence, as a strong believer in therapy, it helps in expressing yourselves, which...

I am in the midst of a month-long Netflix binge.  My current indulgence is the second season of Never Have I Ever (disclaimer: this post is unlikely to be a spoiler because the season came out many moons ago.) Devi dates both Ben and Paxton, thus cheating on both boys. As predicted, when they eventually find out about the “betrayal”, both boys are upset, as most people would be, and make her “pay” for it.  This got me thinking, as do most conversations about infidelity, what makes infidelity hurt so much? Does revenge really make up for pain? Conversations with...